Photo courtesy of: themodernservant.com website
The picture above could not fully express the intense frustration I had been feeling the past few weeks over my hair. If you guys have been following me I decided to give my hair some looong over due tender, loving, and care after noticing the long term affects of wearing weave. With this new found love I dove head first...like I always do. When I set my mind on something I am excited about I am allll in, until the real work begins and I start questioning "What did I get myself into?!"
The first couple of days I was very eager to learn my hair and how to care for it. I began researching on several natural sites and YouTube videos. I had also reached out to my friends who have been natural longer than me on tips. I learned early that doing research was the best thing to do when starting out your natural hair process. I took notes on what products were good, cute styles for my hair type , number of protective styles and most importantly my hair type.
According to the hair type scale I found on curlyhair.com, I am between a 4a/4b which means my hair curl type is tightly coiled. I have a nice curl pattern all over. My hair is much thicker in the back but fine in the front. I meant to take a picture to show you guys but in true Bran fashion I forgot...lol Now I haven't established my hair density which I'm in the process of finding out. Not too sure of the importance of knowing my hair density but I will find out and share.
Fully equipped with a little bit of knowledge it was time for me to put what I learned into use. I found two styles I wanted to try such as the wash n go and two strand twists. The styling method I felt most comfortable with was two strand twists. I choose this style simply because it was easy for me to manage. During my research I started to feel overwhelmed with the many styles and what products to use that twisting my hair did not seem complicated to me and for those who know me I am super challenged on the hair tip. So starting with something simple was the best way to go.
My initial reaction when I took the twists down was "Okay, how can I make this look cute and presentable at work?" Because what I saw was a mess. My hair looked like I stuck my finger in a electrical socket..lol. I liked the curl pattern towards the back but as I got to the front it wasn't looking so hot. Plus with my sides being so weak it didn't make my hair look full. After a few days of wearing the twists I pulled it up into a ponytail..which was okay.
Later on in the week I had a conversation with my friend Danielle voicing my frustrations on my 1st attempt at two strand twisting. Her advice was to try smaller twists and curl the ends with a stain roller. She also informed me to try for a bang so when I unraveled the twists it would be in a style. I tried her advice minus the rollers because I didn't have any. I gave it a couple days before taking the twists down but again I wasn't feeling my twists and I still didn't feel 100% with my styling abilities.
After the 2nd attempt of two strand twisting my hair..my frustration reached a level of anger and regret. My decision to wear my natural hair started to weigh hard on me. Was all this work worth what I wanted to achieve? Did I have the energy to continue even though I felt defeated? I was not aware of how much work goes into taking care of natural hair. It is a loooot of work. I was a super milli-second close to calling my girl Niesh for a sew-in..but I stopped myself and thought I haven't given a real full solid effort with my hair.
To prevent me from making any rash decisions I looked for guidance and support. I read a number of stories on various sites on natural hair frustrations. The stories summed up that being frustrated was part of the process. What I was feeling was normal reaction. After reading the stories and advice my mind was began to be at ease. As usual I was losing sight of what was important and I let my emotions control everything. I'm working on that guys..lol. Going back to what was comfortable wasn't going to be a option. So to I needed to re-group. To relieve the adding stress for a couple days I went to my wigs and protective style: two French braids.
My washing night started with a pre-poo with the Shea Moistures Volumunizing Conditioner. A pre-poo is using a form of a conditioner or oil of your choice and letting it set for 20 minutes. The pre-poo helped me detangle a lot better, plus i noticed less shedding. I followed the pre-poo with a regular wash using the Elasta QP Olive Oil & Mango Butter shampoo. This shampoo smells amazing! I rinsed with cool water. After my wash I deep conditioned with the left over egg, mayo and honey conditioner I also included another conditioner I had at home, I can't remember the name of the product. I deep conditioned for an hour then rinsed with cool water. I rinse with cool water to reduce any frizz (learned that on YouTube..lol) Once the conditioner was fully washed out it was time to style. I choose the two strand twist style again. I am determined to master this style. I found a different way to get more definition for my curls. I got the method off a natural YouTube channel but I again I can't remember the name..once I get the name I will share it with you guys.
I am veryproud of myself for not giving up. I know now that there are going to be many days to come where I'll be at this same road thinking about going back to what's easy but now I know how to handle it. I am slowly embracing this change..it's still baby steps but I'm gettin there. This situation has got me to thinking how do you guys handle your frustrations? What are some tips did you used and was it helpful? Feel free to share and comment.
Thanks for reading my latest and greatest on my natural hair experience. Be sure to check out my Braces Journey too! Until the next time I'll talk to you guys soon.
All products used were paid by me and not supplied by any companies.
-Missbrannew 😊
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